To: Wilhelm HI Bleek (16 March 1862)

To: Wilhelm HI Bleek (16 March 1862)

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Title

To: Wilhelm HI Bleek (16 March 1862)

Collection

Correspondence

Summary

A letter from Jemima Lloyd to Wilhelm Bleek, sent from Coulsdon Court, Surrey, 16 March 1862. Anxiously awaiting his answer to her January letter, she both longs for and dreads it. Knowing he loves her, she believes all will be well, but she fears he may not have grasped her true heart through her "confused exposition" of feelings. She trusts he has now read her February letter, where she revealed her true mind, and hopes that response will bring him happiness. She describes the toll of waiting-the physical strain, the pain of hiding her feelings from Aunt Julia and the lack of sympathy she craves. She repeats why she has not confided in her aunt, though it weighs on her. She reassures Wilhelm that though her emotions may pain him, their "loving trust" demands honesty, but she withholds certain words until she knows "how they stand to each other". She reflects on the limits of written words but recalls how, in Cape Town, she felt he could read her thoughts. She ends with an update on her health and exhaustion from social demands before breaking off to rest.

Date

16 March 1862

Keyword
answeranxietyaunt/sAunt JuliaByronsconcealing feelingsconfirmation of engagementconfusionCoulsdon Courtcourtship correspondencecraving sympathyCroydondental paindentistdreadengagementEnglish familyEnglish weatherexhaustionexplanationfamilyfearsfeelingsfirst meetingfriendsill healthinfluenzahappinesshearthistoryhonestyhopes and fearshow they standjoyJulia ByronletterLondonloveloving comfortloving trustloving trusting wordsLouiLucy LloydMarch 1862mind readingmisunderstandingmothermother's familyMrs Fisherpainpersonal historyrealised feelingsrelationsSandersonssecrecyshocking lettersistersocial obligationsstruggleSurreysuspenseteethtelling peoplethought-readingtraveltrue feelingsuncertaintyunworthinessvisitswaitingweatherwithholdingwriting lettersWilhelm Bleek

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